Men and dating just don’t go hand in hand do they? And now that the best seller trilogy of 50 Shades of Grey has been read by almost every woman on the planet, their expectations of us men have gone up even more. Perhaps they are not overly interested in the bedroom antics of Christian 
Grey and Ana, but they want what he gives her outside of that. Women suddenly feel as if they all deserve the rich billionaire who has the most amazing apartment and servants, and who buys his girlfriends new cars as if they were pairs of socks. According to Dr. Laura Berman
Christian Grey seems to be the perfect man. […] Many readers say he has qualities they love and, even though they recognize he is emotionally challenged, they focus on the positive aspects of this character.
The fact that the combination of his positive aspects will never exist in any real man, this is now what many women want. And now that we know who will be playing Mr Grey in the upcoming movie (Matt Bomer, absolute heartthrob), it seems the everyday man may as well give up. However, all is not lost and there are still plenty of ways to be someone’s Christian Grey.
How to Get the Woman of Your Dreams
The problem is that most of us now turn to the internet to find the answers to any questions we like. And if we are looking for ways to get a woman to like us, we will be bombarded with all sorts of nonsense that any woman would laugh her socks off at. Then again, that might be a great opening line, because laughter is always a good ice breaker. The amount of rubbish that is out there, however, is really frightening. The websites know that they are rubbish, but they then add things that make it sounds as if women only pretend to not like these things in the hopes of pulling you in and making you buy their “amazing” systems. One example is provided by Seduce in Seconds. The name of the site alone should send huge alarm bells ringing, of course, but their suggestions should too. For instance:
You will learn how to get a girl to kiss you by using teasing, rewarding and playfulness. This tested method has proven to work 80 percent of the time where within 15 minutes she will be trying to kiss you.
Be weary of any website that throws percentages and exact times at you. These theories of theirs could not possibly have been tested and they are downright lies.
So What Does Work?
Do not despair. Just because a few crummy internet websites offer nothing but lies in the hopes of selling you their products doesn’t mean you are doomed to fail. You have to look at things from the perspective that you shouldn’t want to find any girl and get what you want there and then. You want to be able to find THE girl and be with her for as far as your relationship takes you. The old saying is that nothing will come to you when you are looking for it, and that is very true. In order to be somebody’s dream man, you have to first love yourself and be secure in yourself. Hence, if you want to use the internet in order to learn how to get the girl, start by working on your self esteem. For instance, according to Abundace Tapestry
I found out that self-esteem and self-love are issues that are often related together. If you suffer from low self esteem, it is possible that the the root cause is a case of insufficient self-love. […] When you don’t love yourself, you are basically telling the Universe that you are unworthy or undeserving of any love or positive outcomes that have the same vibrational match as love. Learning to love yourself starts with making a conscious decision, an intention to become happy and lead a fulfilled life.
Basically, all of this means that in order to find the woman of your dreams, you first have to be the man of your own dreams. Being happy and comfortable with yourself shows confidence and that is exactly what women are interested in. Women don’t want to be with someone who needs to be guided and mollycoddled. In fact, the idea that women always try to change men to suit their needs is ridiculous. What is far more true is that women are presented with a man who is damaged, and they fix him. But they would much rather be with the already fixed product and enjoy their lives.
What Women Really Look for in a Man
So what is it that women really want? Is there anything we can do to change ourselves so we become the perfect man? First of all, you must realize that there is no perfect man and that different women have different opinions on what does and doesn’t matter. A few things, however, seem to come back again and again when asked what women really want. According to Future Scopes
Beneath the myriad shades of moods, temperaments, whims and fancies that set them apart, there runs a common strand that joins the whole lot of women.
The things that all women want are honesty, a sense of humor, the ability to protect them, intelligence, loyalty, chivalry, manners, hygiene, the ability to have her own space, being a friend as well as a lover, and not being clingy or possessive. Basically, what they want is someone who treats them with respect and they will treat you with the same respect in return. Going back to the issue of self-love, you will see how it is impossible to give a woman what she wants unless you feel confident in yourself. After all, if you think you are unworthy of love and care, for instance, will you ever truly be able not to be clingy or possessive?
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