No matter what culture you’re from, your status in life, or even your age, there is one thing that we all have in common. No one truly wants to be alone. Still, as natural as it is to want a woman at your side it is probably one of the most difficult things that a man can do. Even when you’re constantly surrounded by people, the ability to find and meet the right woman often eludes many. According to dating experts from match.com, the secret is in your approach,
It’s not easy to change who you are. Think of it in basketball terms. If your team lacks height, you don’t repeatedly try to go inside. No, you use your speed, passing and outside shooting to beat the competition. Same goes with dating: Play up your strengths, and you’ll improve your odds of romantic success.
Here are a few tips on how to get past that first hurdle.
Be in the Right Place for You
Don’t just jump into a scene because your friends tell you it’s a great place to meet women. You need to feel comfortable in your environment and that means that you need to choose a place where you can fit in. It’s much easier to talk to women when you’re in your natural element. This is especially true for those who may be naturally shy, so rather than you heading off to the local hotspot, find the venue that will suit you the best. If you’re in a location where you can demonstrate some of your knowledge and skill, you’ll feel much more confident than in a random location where everyone is trying to shine.
Don’t Feign Interest – Show It
A woman can be like a metal detector. She can almost instantly tell if you’re the real deal and if you’re putting on a performance or not. Some guys feel that they need to act a certain way to make an impression, and while that may impress some, it will certainly get you tanked with others. If you’re looking for a woman who will be interested in you then you should be able to show genuine interest in her. Instead of putting on a performance to impress her, show that you want to know more about who she is. You can do this through an effective use of questions. Rather than asking the usual, ‘what do you do?’ or ‘where are you from?’ think of some open ended questions to show her your level of interest. Ask questions that will fall outside of the norm and you’ll have her engaged in everything you have to say.
No matter what questions you ask, it is very important that you stay engaged in the conversation. If you’re ADD or something, you really have to fight the temptation to let your mind wander off while she’s answering your very perfectly planned questions. If she discovers that you’re not listening, the whole thing is over and done with before it even gets started.
As always, you’ll want to avoid being too intrusive. The first thing you discuss with her should not be something too personal but just enough to keep the conversation flowing freely. Take the advice of Mallorie Greene of The Made Man,
Good questions to ask a girl when you meet her are usually not intrusive questions that will make her feel uncomfortable. Usually, these questions are used to learn unknown facts about a girl so you both can have a continuous conversation together.
If you can figure out the right location and the right questions to break the ice, you’re almost home free. After that, your personality can kick in and you’re ready to take it to the next level.